I don't hate anybody. I merely don't appreciate the fact some people exist.

It ain't your first thought. I think, but I don't know what your thought is. Whatever it may be, it ain't so now your all confused. It's not like I harbour ill feelings against anybody. There's not enough time to hate or bear grudges. Why burden and slow myself with such unpleasantness. I don't need that, it would be most counter productive to life's main objective. To last until tomorrow. Which is hard enough. Who knows when one day you just step out the front door and then your beat to death by a raccoon with mini-fridge. Well maybe not a raccoon with a mini-fridge but the point is the same. Life is its own worst enemy.

The only hate I harbour is to those who harbour and spread hate. Go die you close minded, ignorant people.

That's that our my system.

Not like my system actually works any more beyond simply going on and on and on. I'm just sort of there without much of a plan of where I'm going to go or what I'm going to do on a day to day basis.

Happy for Dan's happy.

Lows are so dull and depressing. I think it's time I earn't an high for myself. Life doesn't owe anything to us, so why wait around when it's waiting for you claim it. It's just really high up and it's hard to keep motivated on the climb with nothing to aim for but an end result.

CHECKPOINT.

I've put a number of post-it notes up around my room recently. (Wednesday morning at about 2) that have written on them where I go wrong so I never fail again, as well as a number of quotes and lyrics, some motivational, some not so. What remains to be seen is whether I've actually learnt from my past failures. Whether I can prove to somebody who'll risk it and more importantly to myself that I can do things right, and that I'm not a human embodiment of disappointment.

This may seem a bit of a depressing post but trust me, its dark, sort of moody, and this is how a climb to happiness starts. In the threatening shadow of gloom and despair that grows from within. But a metaphorical climb is easier with a metaphorical rope and a metaphorical helping hand on the end of it. I'm open to any help anyone is kind enough to give.